I recently read a tweet that our parents will get shocked at the number of us who are not looking into marriage.
And easy as it is to brush it off…
There’s so much to where that is coming from.
When an ‘aunty'(ies) randomly mentions ‘if you get married to this particular tribe, don’t expect me to attend your wedding or have a certain connection with me…..
When a mum randomly tells a daughter not to bring her a son in-law that has dreads, tattoos and all that, reason being, simply because it is ‘absurd’ for a man to grow hair’…. not to forget that in the 80’s and beyond our fathers had fros
A son who is very much pressured to bring home a church girl, with no tattoos, no dreads..basically a ‘well- bred’ one
A daughter who is expected to bring home a very well off son in law when really they are all figuring out how their careers will turn out like
I don’t think people understand how complex they’ve made marriage for their children. It’s one thing to want the best for your children and it’s another thing to just impose your preferences on them.
Imagine they’ve probably done their life for the best part to match your standards. Yet, you don’t have the tiny bit of interest to know what their interests are like. Very selfish, don’t you think?
Yes , I get it, you’re looking out for them. But part of it should be giving them the freedom of deciding what path they want to be on without any judgements.
Trust me, choosing someone to do forever with, is as dangerous as getting shot or stabbed in the heart.
Given that most of us have grown observing different marriage settings around us, we are either aiming for something similar, better or running away from it all together.
For the youth, choose your path boldly and own it. People tend to warm up towards purpose. Also, please go easy on yourselves.
But all in all, I acknowledge that there’s a generation gap between our parents and us. So for the sake of everyone’s sanity please throw all that pressure out of the window and live.
Love and Light Nelly ❣️
Ps: This piece was written by the one and only Nelly, a lady that is all about good vibes and energies. She is one I’m humbled to call my friend and she runs the blog Indulgewithnelly.wordpress.com You might want to check it out