Everyone has a story and some people not only find it therapeutic telling their stories but also love seeing change happening through the stories they tell. I mean, aren’t some stories better off told? Mostly for our own good and at times for the good of others around us.
I had a discussion with a friend a while back that made me realize how afraid or scared some people (me included) are to share certain stories out there even when we aren’t supposed to feel that way. Of course we all have different reasons why we choose not to share what we don’t. And we all have that right!
I have a friend who told me a little about her deadbeat father. She has wanted to tell her story and maybe even write about it but she fears. Her relationship with her father was never great. There are things that transpired in her life while growing up that she would love to get off her chest but she gets distracted. She is afraid of what most of us are afraid of. The MONSTER of the FEAR of the UKNOWN.
So apparently, her father left her and her sister when they were young. And he wasn’t present in any way, nor was he supportive. He turned his back on them, and to cut the long story short when they were all grown up and doing their life on their own terms their father suddenly wants to be recognized and fully accepted.
He wants to be shown respect where it’s not even due. You might know or have heard about such deadbeat fathers and sometimes mothers.
So my friend knows that talking about certain things regarding her father that hurt her would help her in moving on and probably give her closure, but she is taken aback by the close relationship she sees her father having with members of the family. She feels like her feelings will not be acknowledged and that sets her back.
Back to my point. I think that any person who has hurt you in any way is someone’s child and they mean the world to someone else out there. Those certain people who do ugly inhuman things do on the contrary mean something to at least one person out there and you can’t do anything about it.
What you can do is realize that you owe yourself the good life, and that good life is standing for yourself and unapologetically owning and telling your story regardless. So what if telling your story won’t sit well with a few others? If standing by your truth will make you walk with your head up a little higher and heal the hurt you suffer, then I would encourage you to not be afraid.
I told you I was over and over again sexually abused by my cousin. (https://wanjirusworld.wordpress.com/2018/10/04/she-ordeal/ )He has a great relationship with my parents. Sucks I know! He has a wife and children. And all my life I was in fear that if I ever told this story I would be responsible for a few broken relationships. This held me back, ate me up like a cancer until late last year when I wrote the story down and shared it. I didn’t expose the name of the person but having the courage to tell that story did wonders for my sanity. I felt peaceful and free.I still do. And I’m glad I did tell it.
Talking to someone or anyone about whatever bothers us is always a step forward to resolving most of our problems. You might not hear what you wanted to hear or get the reaction you expected but there will always be a reaction, and that is what you might have needed at that moment.
There is no greater agony than hoarding an untold story within you. A story that wants to be told is better of told. I applaud anyone who tell their story or stories the best way they can. Whether through writing, music, dance, photography, fashion, through spoken narrative, art or whatever way. You matter! And may you keep doing that because someone somewhere watches, listens and gets inspired. And you at the end of it all, you get to smile.
My mantra this year is to continue telling my stories as raw and as true as they are. Not excusing bullshit. Fighting and standing for myself and having room to hear other people’s opinions and if they don’t correspond to mine learn not to take them personally. And while at it challenging my mindset.
Pic:Courtesy of google